The Next Ten Drawings for NYTimes’ “Modern Love”
As a reference, today’s is a woman on a boat hugging a tortoise: http://nyti.ms/153OsOC.
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-drawings by @lilyrothman and @elihuman
Why There’s Traffic
Too many cars
Lots of lights are red
Accident ahead
Because it build character
No one’s in a rush
This road only goes in a circle
Everyone’s thinking about something else
Michelin, god of cars, is displeased
It’s a drive-in movie theater
No one knows
Great New Apps
App Finder- Helps you find more apps.
Counting- This app helps you count.
Pep Talk- has over 100 historic pep talks.
Cereal- A beautiful slideshow of bowls of breakfast cereal.
High Low- You guess a number and this app tells you if it is high or low.
Favorite App- This app will be your favorite app.
App App- Comes with three other apps.
Horsing Around- Roll on the ground with your device and this will make it sound like ol’fashioned horse play.
Same Phone- Finds the person closest to you with your same phone.
Things You Should Know About Hospitals
It’s where sick people come from.
There are more than 100 of them world wide.
Some of the beds in hospitals are on wheels.
Sometimes there are people in those beds.
Hospitals are taller than me or you.
Mars has no visible hospitals.
If you go in a hospital and the person asks if you would like to make a deposit, you’re in
a bank.
In hospitals, regular people hold bags of human blood.
In Spanish, hospital is pronounced hospital.
Running in a hospital is good luck.
What’s Happening At The Dog Park
Ball not thrown far enough
Fence latched
Dog standing on picknick table
Girl brushing back hair with hand
Neighbor still talking
Balanced relationship talk going on
Wood chip finding way into wool sock
Ball being peed on
Tail swinging in 4-4 time signature
Guy holding coffee
What New Yorkers Did For New Year’s Eve
Stood outside
Brought in both noise and funk
Moved to LA
Wore their 2013 reading glasses
Explained Kardashanye baby to parents
Founded a non-profit for people lacking party hats
Rolled eyes
Resolved to make resolutions next year
Donated $10 million to a library
Yelled out numbers with well dressed strangers
What Our Sweater Is Made Of
Lambswool
Cashmere
Fibrous protein from skin follicles
Dan Merino wool
Recycled vintage sweaters
Organic live bunnies
The strands of time
L.L. Bean catalogs
Mirrors
A lot of heart
When We’re Giving Up
Never
Right now
In a sec
Post-haste
In due time
When the lawyer says so
When you learn to say please
After you look at what’s over there
If it turns out there’s no Arbor Day Fairy
Animals That Would Lie to Your Face
Fox
Cheetah
Polar Bear
Stoat
Blue Jay
Peacock
Donkey
Swan
Octopus
Dolphin
Komodo dragon
All monkeys
Signs That the World Is About to End
We’re out of mayo
Mayan neighbor acting real hoity-toity
Internet being slow
Pope’s last tweet: “See you later suckas”
Pretty girl on subway is kissing that guy
Store sign reads “Going out of business”
Been 3 hours since latest terrible thing happened in the world
Guy from HR smiling
Uncle Thaddeus seems sober
The numbers 12, 21, and 12 are all mentioned in The Bible
What We’re Talking to Our Doctor About
The state of his colon
Our bodies, ourselves
How many Zyrtec samples she can hand out at once
Benefits of a ‘no-exercise’ diet
Her waiting room Christmas album
Our missing left leg
Mole on back that looks like Jesus
His new one-man show, “Doctors With Borders”
Prescription for 3rd season of Downton Abbey
How great medicine is
What’s in Santa’s Beard
The only two snowflakes that are exactly the same
Dandruff
A hanky
A little dressing
Gingerbread crumbs
Amelia Earhart
A small but growing Santa embryo
His newest manuscript
A pine cone from the first Christmas tree
What You Should Know About Babies
They’re smaller than other humans
They don’t finish what they start
They don’t know how to text
Babies cannot work for more than 4 hours in a day
Look Who’s Talking is not a documentary
Some people think they see Vienna Sausages, when really they’re looking at baby hands
Babies can’t understand you
They are terrible spellers
Babies have no favorite teams
Things to Leave Out For Santa
A note
Bowl of sugar for the reindeer
A six-pack
Favorite book
The recycling
Last year’s return items
Check or money order
First born
Couple of chicks
Head of Tooth Fairy
